L.O.V.E. (Part II)

Well it's been more than a week now since i posted anything in this 'Melancholic Lullabies" of mine..well i guess this is kinda the right moment to post a new post inside here, so that your weekend would be worse than ever - reading my blog that completely brings nothing of significant..i think.

By tomorrow, i'll be going to the wedding of Azrul (my cousin) and Ruby in the famous Dewan MErak Kayangan..or something that sounds like it. Ah, finally they are tying the knot. Its nice to see such nice happy endings ala a fairytale story. Well, that's love. Either you end your life holding hands with your loved ones till the very end of your life, fulfilling every vows that you announced on your historical magical wedding day..or you also - due to love - might end up sitting alone, wanting nothing more of the heartaches the game could offer..

In English we call it 'fate', 'destiny'..in Malay it's jodoh. Jodoh as they say, has already been fixed by God, as same as our death. Not being an anti-orthodox or anything, but yes, i do believe that death and jodoh is all has been arranged by God. So as our success, our failure, our achievements, our gain and our loss..i think that too, has been prefixed by God. But can a man be a successful CEO by not putting any effort? God has stated in the holy book of Quran, that he will permit us change, but only if we put effort in it. As to that, i believe that jodoh is also something you have to work on too, something you have to put effort to make it work.

The thing we (mostly us, the Malays) do today, that if anything goes wrong, we have this tendency of putting all the blame towards jodoh. If a married couple divorces, they blame it on jodoh. If a woman found herself still holding the 'single' title when she's 40, yep, she'll blame it on jodoh. For me, jodoh is just a scapegoat we choose to use when things go bleak. A total devoted believer of jodoh would actually (i think) cage her daughter in a room in the highest tower ala Rapunzel and still, one day, a man would come and offer marriage. Are you sh#*&ing me?? What happens when divorces happens? do you work it out first? Go to counseling? Rekindle your every first moments by going to the places you've gone while you were madly drunkly in love during your youthful time? or you just blame it to 'oh there's no jodoh, what to do, what to do.."??It may sound easy, but complicated things. problems that we continuously have around us, it's wiser to pick one problem at a time and work it out rather than using the 'jump ship' method all the time.

So what if one day, you woke up feeling - damn it i have been with this guy/chick for a year now, and suddenly i have this boring feeling. I don't want to see his/her face ever again. I want to be single again?? Then you'll end up being another number in the statistics of unmarried people - who'll always blame it on jodoh, blaming on high demands in workplace, blaming of lack of time, blaming the ill fated bad-luck that you inherited from your late late late late great great great granma/granpa. When it is plainly seen that you yourself doesn't have the maturity to handle complicated situation in a relationship. Of course the first few months of love can be so sweet, then when it reaches a year or two, then only our commitment and maturity will be put to test. And often we fail, as it is human nature, for us, we only want the sweet part of things, and ignore the bitter taste that could offer nothing but hurt, heartaches, boredom, frustration and bla bla bla...

It's easy to fall in love, but to keep yourself to be in love is a totally different matter. Commitment, loyalty, toleration, patience are all the things you need to survive in the battle, as love not only gives you hope, passion, the cloud-9 feeling, it also in time, will offer you heartache, hurt, boredom, vengeance and all the other bad things the world could possibly offer. When your bf/gf cursed you and screamed at you, the choice is yours to scream back, or even to tie her and hit her with a 4x4 vehicle..it may sound fulfilling to your hatred feelings for him/her, but anger and temper would never resolve and solve anything.That's the one valuable lesson i have learned..is to lose your temper, is to only brings matter worse..

Well thats if for now i guess, gotta pack my things and figure out what i'm gonna buy as a wedding gift for Azrul and Ruby..Take care and au revoir~

I Want...

If you just give me the chance, these are the things i dream that i want to do, of course, for you..







I want you to always feel happy, never ever has a single thing to worry

I want to hold your hand, while we sleep, while we talk, and while looking at the sunset we stand

I want to kiss you good morning, and cover you with blanket and wait for you to fall asleep and peck you on the cheek wishing you good night

I want you to smile, every time you remember me by

I want you to never have to say you're sorry

I want you to never have to feel sad, down, gloomy or mad

I want you to never have to feel lonely, frustrated and bored

I want you to know how much i love you, there's nothing that i won't do for you

I want you to cage me, as for you, i don't want to be free

I want to grow old with you, do dishes together, while we cry ourselves out with laughter

I want to be the only one for you, cheering you up, whenever you feel blue

I want to be your shoulder to cry on, i'll be there till all your tears are gone

I want to be your soulmate, a place for you to love and hate

I want nothing more, but to see your face everytime i knock at the door

I want to be remembered, as your best man ever

I want to hold you in my arms, to make you feel safe, to make you feel warm

I want to outlive myself for you, to know that it's best thing that i will ever do

I want to show how much you mean to me, i would give you the world, the sky and the sea

I want to die in your arms, smiling saying goodbye for the very last time

I want to love you like no other person could possibly do.

Azie, I want only you.

And I thank you for being there for me, to love and to care, forever I'm in debt to the priceless moments we share.